Fight Fear With Positive Statements
What's your biggest fear when telling your story?
Sounding stupid
Saying the wrong thing
Talking for too long or too fast
Being misunderstood
Not making enough (or too much) eye contact
Being boring
Getting stuck, freezing, forgetting what I’m supposed to say
Not being an expert/ having enough experience
Not believing in myself
I've been teaching my “Tell Your Story” pitching and presenting class for two and half years now and people's fears never change. No matter their age, experience, or industry everyone can relate to some or all of these fears when it comes to talking about their businesses, their ideas and/or themselves.
And guess what? I still have them too, which is a good thing because when we stop being afraid or having nerves it means we’ve stopped caring about the thing we’re talking about. (Even Olympic medalist skier Mikaela Shiffrin puked before her first run.)
How to calm, or more realistically, harness these nerves for good not evil before a big pitch?
1. Acknowledge your fears! Write them down and then say them out loud - to a coworker, a friend, or to yourself in a mirror. By putting them out into world you’ve already taken away some of their power.
2. Turn your fears into positive "I am" or "I will" statements. That's right, flip the switch and show them who's boss. For example:
Sounding stupid –> I am smart and therefore will sound smart.
Saying the wrong thing –> I will not say the wrong thing, but if I do, it will be ok and I’ll will keep moving forward.
Talking for too long or too fast –> I will talk for the right amount of time for my audience.
Being misunderstood – > I will speak clearly and answer questions as they come.
Not making enough (or too much) eye contact –> I will do my best to make eye contact.
Being boring –> I am excited about my business/project and will express this excitement.
Getting stuck, freezing, forgetting what I’m supposed to say –> I might get stuck but I will handle it with grace and check my notes.
Not being an expert/ having enough experience –> I have unique experiences and perspectives to share with others.
Not believing in myself –> I am freaking awesome! (repeat this over and over as needed.)
Did you notice how by turning the negative fear statements into positive ones you also came up with plans on how to overcome obstacles in the moment? (i.e. look at my notes, keep moving forward, answer questions as they come.)
Being a confident speaker is as much about prep and practice as it is about being flexible in the moment and going with the flow. If you'd like to learn more, join my next "Tell Your Story" workshop on March 12th in NYC at LMHQ, details here or we can lead a session with your team.